我乾脆一頭撞死算了

水瓶座:在爱情问题上,水瓶是最不会沉浸其中的星座,这和你不习惯与人斯守的性情有关。爱我:水瓶遇到喜欢自己的人会显得有些“霸道”,爱与不爱 自己也弄不清楚,只因为你爱的是自己。我爱:很少能看到一个水瓶座的人茶不思饭不想地坠入情网。想让水瓶一腔热血地主动去爱一个人,恐怕没那么容易。

双鱼座:爱情对双鱼来说是生命里最重要的过程,找个爱自己的人才是最保险的系数。爱我:双鱼的敏感与柔弱注定了要扮演被人爱的角色,如果遇到了 一个同样需要被爱的人,你们必然痛苦不堪,会抱怨对方自私不够疼爱自己。我爱:双鱼对感情是乐于付出的,但付出一定要有回报,否则会伤心不已。

哭出一個休止符

突然想哭 我想不是因爲孤獨

是因爲無助 心裏有說不出的痛楚

煙火再璀璨最終還是要落幕 感情淡了誰也止不住

很想哭 雖然知道沒幫助

我們踏著不同的腳步 永遠都不會走一樣的路

我怎麽還想得到你的矚目 儅你只會讓我哭

哭得多無助 你也不會把我記住

Sentosa with humparang friends

Went to Sentosa yesterday with a humparang mixture of friends – Linda, Mandy, Cheryl, Khai Yuen, Chyork our fave calendar boy, Yong Yang, Allan, Kesmond and Chun Meng!

We played all sorts of ball games – none that I excelled at. Bleh! But I had fun nonetheless. 我享受貼近大自然的感覺! 縱使那裏人實在太多,但至少有沙灘有海浪有云。 還有好朋友,那是最重要的。=)

Yay, 一指神功! Chyork is so easily amused!! My Malaysian accent effortlessly sent him into peals of laughter. And it’s a wonder he still finds it amusing after an entire day of listening to my accent!

We lied down for less than 3 minutes before a waiter came and asked “any drinks for you, ma’am?” -_- That’s just a nicer way of saying “Would you mind extricating yourself from these beach chairs since they’re meant only for paying customers?” Nice display of hospitality, Sentosa.

Enjoyed lying down on the cool sand… we were just chatting lazily and staring into the cloudy sky, letting the sand run through our fingers. For a moment we were all free from the care and worries of the world. We need to do this more often!

HAHA. Khai yuen is so unglam! I really am dying to box him, lor.

懂得感激

it’s been a turbulent two weeks and i’m flouting international guidelines for bad vibes emission big-time.

lost my awareness. i scurry around like a lab rat everyday and forget appreciating the good things that happen to me. so, a list of things and people that i’m grateful for:

  • online “reunion” with Jia En. I liked to call her Loiloi in JC. we havent talked ever since graduation and she suddenly messaged me on MSN. feels the same…. my heart was warmed. HAHA i hope this is not too “eew-girly” for you, jia en!
  • support from friends and family. i miss watching HK drama serials with my mum and papa in their room. i used to do that every night, until i got murdered by work. i hardly speak to them because i’m glued to the computer screen every time i’m home. and i’ll snap at them if they ask me things while i’m at work. if this continues i will quit. really, to hell with the “portfolio”.
  • they might not know it, but MSN convos with friends while i’m at work help make the drudgery a little easier to stomach. =)
  • Toilet Gang. ky calls us restroom gang for some odd reason. what a euphemism! met up with them last week? feels eons ago. BOBO is back! heh. they help keep me sane. look what brainless work can do to me. my sentences are so underdeveloped. 1000 blehs.
  • Cute kids from everywhere! eric’s cute nephew is now my MSN display pic. looking at him helps me destress.
  • AWW~ cutecutecute! 1000 muacks!
  • he’s got cookie crumbs threatening to burst forth from his mouth but i think he has shuaige potential in this one! i’m referring to the baby, btw. 😛
  • Dr Dennis Jowaisas!! he’s my lecturer for research methodology and i really like him! so grandfatherly. i admire how he’s able to be no-nonsense and humorous at the same time. not many people can do that.

Dr J and us~

Ok im getting back to The Cursed Drudgery That Will Ruin My Life Before I Can Say “Bloody”.

All work and no play

I feel so lifeless if I dont blog. Am so besieged by dreadful work to the extent that I’m losing my bearings. I know my kidneys are failing thanks to all those late nights. Such unspeakable agony.

I long to run on the grass, frolic on the beach, and PLAY BASKETBALL. Let off steam. Ditch all the bloody obligations. And just run away. All I want to do is rest and play.

I MISS IDLING. I cant believe I just sold myself to lifelong slavery Just to earn a pathetic sum of money. Should i quit? Be a poor(er) idler than a poor zombie?

The last thing I want to do now is stare at this monitor screen. I can’t believe there’s no ice cream left in the fridge! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME, WORLD?!

The words “bloody” “算了“ and “HAR?!” feature prominently in my vocabulary these days. I am bloody, bloody 浮躁。

讓我放縱一次

讓我放縱一次 狠狠拔掉心中的那根刺

讓我放縱一次 丟掉所有虛僞的掩飾

讓我放縱一次 做一些你做夢也想不到的事

讓我放縱一次 人偶爾要讓自己失去理智

讓我放縱一次 就算到最後我們都是凡夫俗子

讓我放縱一次 不想再小心翼翼對待你的名字

讓我放縱一次 是時候輪到我放肆 我其實很不可一世

讓我放縱一次 就算到死我們仍是白癡

讓我放縱一次 把今天當作世界末日

i feel horrid. everything’s smooth sailing except … bleh.

i just find it sad that things seem to be coming to an end, and nothing i do will make the show go on. i think we blew our chances. he blew his and i blew mine.

每一次的心动都那么不了了之,问题出在我身上吗?是我太操之过急了吗。。。 我有点灰心。我不知道,自己该做些什么,还能做什么。会过去的吧? 希望这只是暂时的。我不想一直这样,一颗心悬在半空中, 忐忑不安。

回忆也许美 可是正在飞走对不对