A turn of events

I have many updates for you, blog!

  1. After two good years of freelance work, I am now officially unemployed and looking for a full-time job. The job should: pay enough CPF so that I can finance my house, be something I enjoy doing, not upset my work-life balance.
  2. (I believe I need a good life outside of work in order to be happy)
  3. Derek proposed and I said yes (can say no meh?)
  4. The ROM and wedding was planned as a combined event for Dec 2013 but we have to ROM within the next few months just so we can buy a house together, and enjoy the $30K CPF grant while doing so
  5. Why the rush? We chanced upon a resale flat online and found it a good deal, albeit with a catch. 
  6. We have already signed the Option to Purchase, which means the flat is ours, subject to HDB’s terms
  7. That’s a rather big turn of events within a span of two months, lor.

As I am very free now, I have started to shortlist wedding venues and caterers. I’d be happy to do without a wedding ceremony and spend the money on renovations, but my father will not be happy. Derek does not want him to be unhappy, so I guess we’ll have to respect his wishes somewhat. We had wanted to cap wedding expenses at $5,000 because we felt spending anything more than that is irrational. The money could be put to better, more tangible use – like reno, buying furniture, paying off housing and car loans….

Unfortunately, I think we may have to double this budget, given the number of relatives my father wants to invite. He listed 60 people, and that’s excluding my own friends. In his books, the “closeness” of our relatives is defined by their attendance at my late grandparents’ wake, and if they paid any 白金, although I’ve never met some of the people he listed。 I was pissed off about how 爱面子and 思想老旧 he can be, after questioning him about the relatives he listed and why we should invite them. I think inviting people whom you are not close to gives them pressure – they probably don’t quite feel like coming in the first place but feel obliged to, since you asked. Awkward.

Am I willing to put down my likes and dislikes in order to please him? To what extent? Much as I yearn to hold a low-profile, quaint, intimate wedding attended only by people I know and like (max 50 pax), I don’t think I can without making my father feel disrespected. As I cannot imagine myself holding a banquet/hotel wedding (the pomp!), guess we’d have to find a middle ground and package it nicely before selling it to my father. No far-flung locations, no angmoh food, must have aircon, must have vegetarian options, no mosquitoes. To sum it up, friendly to the typical Chinese-Singaporean elderly. 

No matter what we do, we have to do it in a 心甘情愿 way. 钱要花得心甘情愿,才有意思。我还是相信,我们可以找到一个不用委屈自己,也能令老爸觉得有面子的方法。